“It is such an uncomfortable feeling to know one is a fool.”
L. Frank Baum, The Wonderful Wizard of Oz
Blah. I’m feeling stupid today. Like I just can’t do anything right, or do anything meaningful. How can I do anything meaningful when I am just so damn stupid? =/ I can’t. I’m so sick of myself. I’m sick of listening to myself. Every thought is so… trite. I have nothing worth saying, I can’t do anything…
I’ve been feeling anxious all day. And I hate being asked, “why are you anxious?” Because! Do I really need to nail down a reason? It doesn’t help. More often than not it just makes me depressed. So, anxious, depressed, and stupid. Oh, I feel like such a failure, and I’ve barely even tried! What’s the point in trying?!
Damnit… No one can beat me up like I can. Days like this, I feel like I’ve gone twelve rounds with myself already, and the day isn’t done. I’m sorry for whining, I hate whining. And now I’m pissed at myself. Anxious, depressed, stupid, and pissed.
I don’t know what to do. Hope tomorrow is better, I guess. Write this crap down, like it means anything. Sigh repeatedly at the inane futility that is my life. Laugh at myself, maybe cry a little. Ugh, how pathetic am I?